I recently moved into an apartment complex with over 500 units filled mostly with young professionals. I am quickly realizing there is a stark contrast in “serendipity factor” from my former single family home to this apartment complex. I'm now likely 100 times more likely to experience moments of serendipity than when I lived in a house, where days could pass without seeing anyone beyond delivery drivers and my handful of neighbors.
Serendipity, the fortunate discoveries made by coincidence or accident, shapes our lives more than we acknowledge. Think about your most meaningful relationships. How many were meticulously engineered compared to how many emerged unexpectedly? The friend you met because you both sought shelter from sudden rain, the now-mentor who happened to sit next to you on a flight, or perhaps even your partner, whom you met because you decided to join that local running group on a whim. Our lives are constellations of such moments.
The paradox of serendipity is that while it cannot be forced, it can be cultivated. Taking the scenic route rather than the efficient one, choosing the local coffee shop over the drive-through, or striking up a conversation with a stranger, these small choices dramatically increase the possibility of unexpected encounters in your life.
Our modern world has become increasingly engineered to minimize these random encounters. The pandemic accelerated our retreat into technological bubbles, where we could order everything without a single unplanned human interaction. On the digital front, algorithms feed us what they think we want to see. Efficiency-obsessed schedules leave little room for meandering conversations.
I've recently started to plan for deliberate opportunities for serendipity to occur, creating space in my life for the unexpected. Sometimes this means taking a different route home, sitting in a new section of the park, or simply leaving an hour or two unscheduled in my day. This is a deliberate invitation for chance encounters, acknowledging that not everything worthwhile can be planned.
Reflecting on pivotal moments in my life, I'm struck by how many weren't on any roadmap I'd created, and what other serendipitous moments are left to be had. The friend made from a casual conversation at a wedding. The business partner met through a chance encounter at a coffee shop. Your husband or wife met through attending the book club, or any number of encounters. These unplanned intersections remind us that life always retains its capacity to surprise and redirect us.
The next time you're debating between the direct route and the scenic one, choose the path with more possibilities. Try the new coffee shop instead of your regular spot. Accept that invitation to an event outside your usual interests. Very often, the detours, not the highways, lead us to the best stories and most meaningful destinations. The beauty of life lies not just in what we plan but in our willingness to embrace what we don't.