Ever since grade school, when I first witnessed depression through other students, I’ve contemplated the following thought experiment: What if all a depressed student needs to see is a fellow student’s hint of a smile in order to nudge them back onto the track that life is, in fact, worth living? Conversely, what if all it took was one final off-the-cuff joke made by the school bully to the depressed student that ever-so-slightly nudges them off the edge entirely?
The premise here is not about whether or not you should be able to take a joke, but that if you only knew that they were at their wit’s end, would you act differently? An optimist at heart, I have to think that even the worst of bullies would refrain from telling the joke; some might crack a smile and tell them all of the past jokes had been in good fun, and a few might even give them a hug. The ones that smiled slightly while walking past would almost certainly smile more deliberately or even say hello. Now, I’ve lived more or less a third of my life, so it’s not that I have not been hardened enough by life yet to think that nothing will prevent the bully from his joke, but even the bully has a conscience deep down.
We often underestimate the impact of small gestures in a world that seems to only move leaps and bounds at a time in one direction or the other. A kind word, a simple acknowledgment, or a genuine smile can be the difference between despair and hope for someone teetering on the edge. Just as a single straw can break the camel’s back, a single act of kindness can mend a broken spirit. The human experience is both fragile and resilient, and we have to recognize that although the latter is displayed, the former is often deeper at play.
So many things in life are one nudge away from something big, both in horrible and profoundly remarkable ways. Something as small as your pinky finger being the only thing keeping the fragile wine glass that you’re holding from slipping out of your hands and shattering on the tile floor, to your partner ever-so-subtly flirting with that colleague of theirs for the last time before you can’t take it anymore, or the final Jenga piece, hanging by a lone fiber of wood until the entire tower topples over.
Consider the stories of people who stumbled upon a new passion or career because of a casual conversation or an unexpected opportunity. Imagine a grade school student who is given encouragement from a sculpting teacher who doubles down on this passion, a musician who is greeted by a stranger admiring their music, or a young engineer who is motivated by just a few lone cheers at the school derby. These are not grand gestures or monumental events, but small nudges that either individually, or collectively, culminate into setting the course of a life in a new and often profoundly meaningful direction.
It is enlightening to think that we can all be a source of positivity for others. We never truly know the battles others are fighting. Our smallest actions might have the most significant impact on someone else’s life. A moment of empathy, a listening ear, or a word of encouragement could be the final catalyst for change that they desperately need.
While I have to imagine that you can think of your own unique versions of these scenarios, I encourage you to flip the script and try to seek out themes in your life that could benefit from a small encouraging nudge that propels you into the direction that you want to go, whether that be success, peace, joy, or anything in between. I promise that you will encounter that nudge sooner or later. I can’t be the only person in the world who smiles at strangers, and I know I won’t be the last.
So the next time you pass someone on the street, consider offering a smile. When a friend seems distant, take a moment to check in. If you notice a colleague struggling, offer your support. These gestures may seem insignificant, but they might just be the gentle push that tips the scales toward something wonderful.